Quarkaphobia, living in denial

We all have our favourite things in life. Now when it comes to foods it gets a whole lot more specific. It seems that the experts say that humans, generally, are predominantly sweet or salty types. More than that though there are specific foods that we all enjoy, crave, cannot do without. Cannot do without until they are unavailable that is. Products that are abundance in one place, whether through geography or cost deterrence simply do not exist in other places.

It seems that in my short UK residency I have come to adore, crave, and am now positively addicted to Quark. A soft cheese, “Virtually fat-free”, or so says the packaging, I eat this product with a ferocity that seems to be making up for lost years when their product didn’t exist in my world. Similar in design to cream cheese, I have been known to eat it on toast with tomato, basil, and fresh pepper, yum, or perhaps with some jam added for sugary flavouring (you should taste my Quark Chocolate Protein cake!). In desperate times I have even eaten it straight up, with a spoon, right out of the package. In fact, a “straight-edge Quarker” is how I began my descent into the grips of this Quark madness.

Now all is well in good in London, Quark is in abundance, and cheap, a mere 58p gets a solid container of the succulent goo. I’m buying it by the dozens, walking through the aisles of Sainsbury’s, I’m that guy with 8 Quarks stacked on top of each other, narrowly missing the ceiling beams. Nothing provides greater distress to me then my side of the fridge (more on this later) echoing hollow sounds of inquark-titude.

Shortly my UK experiment will come to a close, which is fine, every chapter has to have an end. But what oh what shall I do without my beloved Quark? I suppose I could always substitute some cream cheese, but my taste-buds will be screaming in tandem with my waists expanding girth. Dearest readers they say that Quark does exist in Canada, alas not in the abundance that it does in the UK. My life without Quark, woe is me, hey (quietly now) I need a quick fix, know anyone with the right stuff?

Quark (or qvark) is a type of fresh cheese of Central European origin. Dictionaries usually translate it as curd cheese. It is soft, white and un-aged, similar to Fromage frais. It is not the same thing as cream cheese or cottage cheese. It is distinctly different from ricotta because ricotta (Italian: recooked) is made from scalded whey.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quark_(dairy_product)